Murder in the Village Square –Osowe Oluwagbenga O

 

reap

Gbagaun! Gbagaun!! Gbagaun!!!

The sounds of the town crier’s bell

His voice soaring above the crowd’s yells

Brings the message from the Overlords loud and clear

O ye people of the village square

The council of Overlords bid you come and hear

 

Murder has been committed in the village square

An atrocity so great my heart can quell its fears

Impish, impertinent, impudent, imprudent

Are mild words to describe these murderers

Come ye citizens and bear witness against them

Come lend your voice to the condemnation of these dangerous ones

 

Overlords:

Bring in the accused, in our judgements we shall indeed be fair

The oath of office that binds us, we still hold dear

Let the accused ones be brought before us

The words from their mouth we are willing to hear

Justice and fairness is our watchword,

So let their accusers also draw near

 

Young men, you have been accused of murder and mutilation

The words of your accusers stand against you this day

I ask you now, what do you say in your defence?

if men

 

1st accused:

My Lord, I does not no my offense!

I update my TL yesterday

To pray four my friend who deed birthday

Then Grammar Police and Tiaun detector

Shouted Gbagaun! Gboom!! Gbosa!!!

And that my lord is how I’ve come here

Overlord:

Stop it! Young man, your grammar is despicable

I would rather that someone speaks  for you

GrammarPolice, I hear you’re the plaintiff

Pray tell this honourable gathering

The offences that these ones have committed

 

GrammarPolice:

Thank you my lords in council

The 1st accused did update his TL indeed

With words that led to the murder of grammar

“You are a blessing to your generator”

The very words with which he committed the crime

 

The 2nd accused is by no means a lesser offender

In matters of sports were his crimes committed

“Messi has worn the award”

“Torress plz I’m on my niece”

“1st lost of the season”

“That penalty does what it”

“This game is making me laughing”

Need I say more your lordship to prove his guilt?

 

The 3rd accused is loquacious, uncouth and rude

Words from her daily form the very essence of malapropism

“I like Selling Dion’s voice”

“Justin Bieber is the Aunty Christ”

“I can’t sleep, I have saw throat”

“Can’t Skype, I’m have naked”

My lords, she is a danger to our existence in this village

 

She rained curses on us to end the year with her parting words

“May God spear our lives”

And started the New Year with injurious words

“Chairs to the freaking New Year”

 

Overlord – in – Chief:

Stop! I pray you

Their guilt you have proven beyond doubt

Now listen to our judgement

The 1st and 2nd shall proceed on 3 months solitary confinement

Brighter Grammar and A1 English their only companions

As for the 3rd accused,

The council finds you guilty of gross murder

You constitute a threat to public piece

(crowd shouts haaaa overlord… public piece ke? gbagaun, gbagaun)

sorry all I meant *peace*

3rd accused, Your citizenship is hereby revoked

And your TWITTER account deleted.

 

 

 

I am @gbengaosowe

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3 Comments (+add yours?)

  1. Damilare
    Jan 23, 2013 @ 17:31:36

    Wow… I’m glad I subscribed to your blog!!! This piece is just … Wow wow wow… Kudos! More grace to your pen… Abi typewriter.. Lol.

    Reply

  2. toyinfabs
    Jan 23, 2013 @ 19:35:07

    ROTFL and shining Oral B whitened teeth……..oya chairs to the readers of this blog….I praying four all of you and I loving you all.

    Reply

  3. Ibukun
    Jan 23, 2013 @ 19:50:10

    Yeeeeeee! This right up is handsome when my uncle have come I we tell them to read two!!!! LMAO. Thumb up to you!!!

    Reply

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