General Alakori and Lieutenants


A smile played on his lips as he saw the invite, he was the one they simply called secretary. He had been waiting albeit impatiently, he knew the situation on ground called for a meeting of the group and had wondered how long it will take Alakori the leader to initiate one. The group existed only in their minds, after each meeting, everyone deletes himself, only Alakori was allowed to be a permanent member.


It had been a great honor to be recruited into Alakori’s team, the secretary was proud; he saw his involvement with someone of Alakori’s caliber apart from the monetary benefits as one more direct step to meeting the commander in chief.


He accepted the invite and gazed at the group page, he perched his horn rimmed glasses on his nose and tapped one callused finger impatiently on the phone screen. This is war, he thought, smiling again. His smile grew wider as he saw the notifications that the others were joining the group, his fingers itched to type something, but he knew the protocol; Alakori had to start.


Alakori: Hello All,

Secretary: Good evening sir.


He would have prostrated if it was possible, it didn’t matter that he was old enough to be Alakori’s uncle, this was a matter of the throat, after all man must wack.


The one they call bouquet, the only lady in the group replied next. Theirs was a group of four, the fourth was the man they called treasurer, he was the youngest amongst them, In fact the Secretary suspected he was no more than twenty-six years old.


Bouquet: Hello All

Treasurer: Evening All

Alakori: welcome everyone, I am sure you are all aware of the recent happenings and that the C in C is not taking that woman’s allegations that he stole money lightly. The other teams are working on damage control via the other channels, but you know it is my responsibility to be in charge of the operation in the town square, that is why I have called this meeting, I need your help my able lieutenants.


The secretary smiled, glad at being referred to as an able lieutenant, he liked the sound of that; he believed he would have made a good army officer if not for his bad right leg.


Secretary: we are ready sir, and we will start making speeches to discredit her immediately.

Alakori: Good! Treasurer? Bouquet? Are you guys in?

Bouquet: Count me in

Treasurer: we will do a good job sir


Alakori: Good! We are very fortunate this time around, there is a way to do it that no one would accuse us of working for the C in C.I am sure you all heard what one of that woman’s lieutenant said tonight, that was the reason I called a meeting of the group. What he said about the son of the supreme deity may be harmless but it is an opportunity we have to seize. We will use his words against him especially since the woman’s colleague, the short general also repeated what the lieutenant said, and even laughed about it. We all know those words were meant to ridicule the other generals and I but we will use it against them.


Bouquet: Wonderful idea sir, you are a genius.


Alakori: Thank you madam. You all know our friend, the very learned one, he has been instructed to kick start the campaign about that statement. He is the best person to start this since he doesn’t support the C in C publicly.


Treasurer: Great idea sir


Alakori: Now, what I need you people to do is ensure that people in the town square get angry about that statement. I want you to start speaking against it and make it sound like you are unhappy the son of the supreme deity was insulted. I know for certain that we have a lot of gullible and unintelligent youths in the townsquare that will agree with you blindly and will embrace the opportunity to be heard. Wage this war with all your heart and above all make sure people in the town square don’t talk about anything else for the rest of this week.


Secretary: I am delighted that you have trusted us with this job and I assure you sir that we will do it satisfactorily.


Alakori: Thank you all, please do the usual.





The group is complete again


Alakori: I must tell you I am very unhappy with the job you guys did, the talk about the blasphemy against the Supreme Deity’s son  has already gone down, whereas it was supposed to last for at least a week. It’s only two days and they have stopped talking about it.


The secretary clenched his fist and gazed at what Alakori typed over and over again. “The bastard” he cursed. He couldn’t even appreciate their efforts.


Bouquet: But sir, we did all we could, we left no stones unturned; we took a lot of abuse from the target’s lieutenants. We were able to get a lot of people who agreed with us and we exploited that opportunity, we made so much noise that the target’s camp was destabilized.


Bouquet was very annoyed at Alakori’s words, she had thought this particular job was going to pay well and that they wont be given the usual =N= 20,000 that was transferred to their accounts whenever they did jobs for Alakori. She had expected this one to pay better.


Secretary: Sir, I personally ensured the lieutenant that made that statement left the town square, I had to search for people that knew him and paid them to give me information about his family; he left the town square after I told him the home address of his parents and other explicit details about his family.


Alakori: Such wonderful job that you did. Is he not back in the town square? The more annoying thing is he is even more popular than before.


The secretary felt the muscle spasms building up in his bad leg, that usually happened when he was very angry, he groped in the dark, searching the bed for the container that contained his pill, PHCN had taken light as usual and he laughed maniacally at how pathetic his life was, he was the one who had said in the town square just that morning that the light in his area had been on for the past two months without interruption when in actual fact PHCN only brought light for them for a maximum of five hours daily. He finally felt his hands close around the container and popped four pills into his mouth, he felt the relief almost instantly, the drug always worked fast. It was one of those drugs that was meant to be sold and used only with a doctor’s prescription but everyone knew almost every illegal thing was possible in the town.


He looked back to his phone’s screen and saw the treasurer’s response to Alakori.


Treasurer: I believe we did a very good job; I focused my attention on showing my disdain for the lieutenant’s statement. I even made statements to show that I believe the supreme deity’s son had been insulted. I made everyone think I loved the deity’s son enough to kill for him. We did such a good job that several people have written about this issue and most of them condemned it as much as we did. So effective was what we did that everybody in the land has forgotten about the woman’s allegations and have now focused their attention on the statement made by the woman’s lieutenant.


Alakori: My friend, that had nothing to do with you, the books that were written were as a result of the strings myself and the other generals pulled. We are disappointed in you all but we will still pay you. Your accounts will be credited with =N= 10,000 each. Good Day.


The lieutenants placed their heads in their hands in their respective houses except for the secretary. He instead burst into a maniacal laugh and even laughed harder when Mama Tinglocha his next door neighbor rapped annoyingly on the wall. The problems were these walls, he muttered bursting into another fit of crazy laughter; they were just too thin. They revealed too much. He stopped laughing only when his ribs started aching. He knew he would still wait for the next assignment, what choice have I he said resignedly, man must wack.






All characters appearing in this work are fictitious. Any resemblance to real persons, living or dead, is purely coincidental.





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